This Week in Movies

Johnny Depp goes gonzo in Puerto Rico; an animated puss struts his stuff; Justin Timberlake continues his attempt at movie stardom; and Shakespeare might turn out to be not so great after all.

More activity of the paranormal variety creeps us the fuck out; the Three Musketeers get Paul W.S. Andersoned; a goofy British spy invades our shores and makes the Revolution all the more sweeter; and an Olsen sister reveals she actually has talent.

We time travel back to the 80s with Footloose and The Thing; a trio of comedians try to make bird-watching hilarious; and Nicolas Cage and Nicole Kidman star in a movie together, even though this is probably the first you’re hearing about it.

George Clooney gets all political on us again; Hugh Jackman teaches a robot how to fight; and another human centipede graces the silver screen. This is your week(end) in movies, October 7-9.

Seth Rogen and Joseph Gordon-Levitt make cancer funny again; Daniel Craig moves into an ironically named house, Anna Faris plays an adorable slut, and two hillbillies get into bloody shenanigans. This is your week(end) in movies, September 30 – October 2.

Brad Pitt and Jonah Hill play with balls; the shirtless kid from Twilight makes a bid for A-list glory; Jason Statham kicks everybody’s ass again; and a gimpy dolphin steals your heart.

Ryan Gosling teaches us how to drive; James Marsden tries to fill Dustin Hoffman’s shoes; Sarah Jessica Parker does… something; and The Lion King evidently needs a re-release. This is your week(end) in movies, September 16 – 18.

We’re once again reminded that we can die via someone else’s sneeze at any time; Nick Swardson makes a play for most annoying-looking character of all time; a mysterious creature terrorizes a group of camping morons; and two pugilist brothers duke it out for badass supremacy.

We find out that we stopped going to the moon because they were making cheesy horror movies there; 3D jumps the shark – again – and an orgy proves to be better when it’s old fashioned. This is your week(end) in movies, September 2-4.

Katie Holmes gets frightened by something other than Tom Cruise for once; Paul Rudd acts like an idiot; and Zoe Saldana makes kicking ass look good.

A couple of remakes no one asked for battle it out in 3D, while the fourth movie in a lame franchise asks you to smell it; also, Anne Hathaway adopts a British accent and does the romantic drama thing for the millionth time. This is your week(end) in movies, August 19-21.

Death continues to kill people; Emma Stone becomes the latest white savior for black people; Jesse Eisenberg is a walking bomb and Glee gets the 3D treatment it has always deserved. This is your week(end) in movies, August 12-14.

New summer movies are out and ready to view — but which one is worth your dollars? We give you the down low as you plan for the weekend.

New summer movies are out and ready to view — but which one is worth your dollars? We give you the down low as you plan for the weekend.

It’s time for Harry Potter… the movie we’ve all been waiting for is finally in theaters. What other movies dare to compete?